5 Simple Things That Help When You're Running on Empty - By Jeannie Cheong
(Photo: Image courtesy of The Calla Project)
Some nights you manage to sleep while the baby sleeps. Other nights, sunlight peeks in while you're still cradling her, hoping she'll finally settle. While you are completely in love with your baby, you are also grieving the life you used to have. Some days are so tiring that you can't remember the last time you had five uninterrupted minutes, in a body that hasn't been fully yours in months.
Weaving in a few minutes (or a few hours if that’s possible) of good quality rest can help you feel less like you're running on empty, and ready to do it all over again. Here are five ideas for you:
Regular movement, even in short bursts.
It doesn't need to be a full workout. Building brisk walking into your week has been linked to a meaningful drop in postpartum depressive symptoms. A short 10 or 15 minute walk around the block with baby in the carrier still adds up over time. If it's easier with company, our team at 13Thirteen runs a regular mummy's walk, a built-in reason to get outside, with a few enthusiastic mummies who will be here for you.
A change of physical state.
Sometimes your body needs something to shift, not just your mind. A hot shower that runs longer than usual, a warm bath, a heating pad on your shoulders, or even a sauna if you have access to one nearby. Anything that gives your body a different sensation than "touched out and upright" for fifteen minutes. If cold water appeals to you, such as at an ice bath house, you can try that as well. Just remember to hold off during your confinement month, since most families feel strongly about avoiding it.
A few minutes of true stillness.
Not scrolling for more sleep-training advice, not planning the next feed. Just quiet, on purpose. If you have a faith, this might be where prayer or sitting with scripture fits into your day. If not, it can be as simple as sitting somewhere quiet and just breathing. Research on structured stillness practices, done consistently over several weeks, has been linked to real reductions in postpartum anxiety and low mood. A single quiet moment won't do all that work on its own, but five minutes with permission to just stop is still a reasonable place to start.
Connection in real life.
The support you already have is worth noticing, even on the days it doesn't feel like enough. Maybe a confinement nanny has moved in to handle the cooking and the structure of the first month, or your own mother or mother-in-law is close by and hands-on, or a massage lady comes by to ease some of the muscle tension. Even when it's not the kind of support where you can share vulnerable thoughts, those moments still make a difference.
A lactation counselor can be another one of these, someone whose job is to actually sit with you and listen, not just check that the latch is right. And a phone call to a friend, not just a text, still counts as connection. Someone who's been through it, or another mother at exactly this stage. Even if you can’t manage a coffee or dessert outing, a voice on the phone is enough for right now.
Protecting the sleep you do get.
A full night isn't realistic right now, but small habits still help. A consistent wind-down, a dark and cool room, leaving the phone outside arm's reach for the last fifteen minutes before you try to sleep. Even if it doesn't fix the broken nights, it still means the sleep you do get will be of a better quality.
Some weeks, being able to fit in one or two of these ideas will be a great start. If you'd like to connect further, 13Thirteen's WhatsApp community, mummy's walks, and lactation counselling support are all there whenever you're ready. Find us on our socials.
If what you're feeling runs deeper than tired, do reach out to a trusted friend, your doctor, or a professional counsellor. Not sure who to approach? Get in touch with 13Thirteen Singapore and we can help point you in the right
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Sources
- Deprato, A., et al. (2025). Impact of postpartum physical activity on maternal depression and anxiety: A systematic review and meta-analysis. British Journal of Sports Medicine, 59(8), 550–561. https://bjsm.bmj.com/content/59/8/550
- Leng, L. L., Yin, X. C., & Ng, S. M. (2023). Mindfulness-based intervention for clinical and subthreshold perinatal depression and anxiety: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Comprehensive Psychiatry, 122, 152375. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0010440X23000123?via%3Dihub